Who’s your…. what are you thinking?

Or should I call it “Whine about a wine bar”?

That wouldn’t be right – I’ve been excited about the prospect of a wine bar on Wray Avenue ever since I heard rumours of it two years ago.

From our recent local precinct meeting, I get the sense that some locals aren’t happy with it, fearing extra drinking in the area (see my last blog post) and the lack of parking (see the blog post before that) to service people who drive to the venue.

For my part, I truly believe small bar culture fosters responsible alcohol consumption. I could wax on about it here, but won’t – it’s not the point I’m making. I also truly believe that there is enough density nearby for most customers at this wine bar to come from the local area.

Idealistic? Perhaps. The Europhile in me would love to see corner bars in every precinct around Fremantle.

I also can’t wait for there to be something happening in that ugly space at the bottom of that fairly ugly building The Fiveways. Plus, it is being started by the owner of Harvest, so it’s bound to be a well run venue.

So why am I annoyed by the news of a wine bar starting there?

Because of its terrible name – “Who’s Your Mamma?”

I could easily sound bourgeois and point out ways that the name, to my mind, in no way connotes wine culture; how it does not connote responsible, knowledgeable drinking; how it does not resonate with the character of the surrounding area.

I could easily sound like a prude, a wowser or a conservative and point out that the name, to my mind, sounds base and crass; that I picture the clientele being exclusively dressed in Ed Hardy clothing; that it does connote (in a tacky, cliche way) a speak-easy, jive culture (not that there is anything wrong with that, except that’d not in any sense what it actually is meant to be); that some I’ve mentioned it to feel it has lurid sexual connotations and find it offensive.

But in actual fact, I just think that the name is really lame.

Why does Harvest get a simple, pleasant name and we get this?

It doesn’t make me think wine; it doesn’t make me think Fremantle.

They could have chosen anything, and they chose this.

I have read through their application to the Department of Racing, Gaming and Liquor to see if I can submit, somewhere, an opposition to their name. I can’t.

Maybe as an English teacher I’m more sensitive to language than others however their description of their target market in their application is a pretty good description of me.

Plus I’m very local.

Who’s you Customer? I don’t think it’ll be me. I’m happy to walk the extra kilometre to Whisper Wine Bar.